The Write Careers for English Majors (and most other “useless” degrees)

As the end of the semester swiftly approaches, I keep getting asked the dreaded question, “What are you going to do after graduation?”
I usually answer this question with one word:
Cry.
And everyone laughs including myself because we all know that the big joke is, well, my degree. Haw haw.
But the thing is, there are actually tons of job opportunities for English majors (that don’t include teaching, thank you very much) and even the other “useless” degrees out there that develop strong writing skills.
Seriously. I know you don’t believe me–I didn’t even believe it until a prof got after me for whining about being stuck in retail until I die. I always thought I’d at least need two more years of school to have any hope of getting out of asking people if they have membership cards to this store and if they’d like to sign up today, but that’s (hopefully) not the case.
Ever heard of copywriting? Technical writing? Seo content writing? Marketing/communications? Writing grant proposals? English graduates are PERFECT for these positions because we spent four years of our life learning how to communicate effectively through text. Trust me, I’ve done my research on these careers, their growth, and the qualifications required to actually get hired in one of them to the point of obsession. I practically live on indeed. Sunlight? What’s that?
This whole interweb thing has done all of us literary nerds a huge favor because these jobs–most of which have online components–are expanding every day.
So after all of my research, I feel it’s safe to say that the myth of useless English majors is in the process of being busted. There’s even technical and copywriting jobs in the closest city to Bumbleton!

Now, I know what you’re thinking, “If all these awesome jobs are out there, why don’t you have one?”
The problem I’m having is the same problem grads from practically every other degree program has: I can’t get a job because I don’t have experience; I can’t get experience because I can’t get a job.
Sadly, most jobs require two to three years of experience, but the good news is that I can get that experience by volunteering my writing skills to NGO’s. This is something I’ve just recently discovered, but it’s looking like I’ll get opportunities to try my hand at all of the careers I listed. Some sites to check out if you’re interested in doing the same are Volunteer Match and Get Involved. I don’t even have to leave my house to pad my resume, and in the mean time, I’ll be helping good causes.
I may not have the dream job yet, but I’m working on it, damn it. I do intend to eventually go back to school, hopefully for an MFA in creative writing because I’ll be a famous author by then (and let’s face it, I’m just a huge nerd that loves school), but until that happens, I will be on the hunt for one of the jobs listed above, and I will keep all of you lovely people informed of my success and lack there of along the way.